REALITY TRUST FUND BOYS
Or, Cooper and Billy go to The Townhouse Penthouse.

“Can I buy you a drink?!”

Startled, I turned to see an older man, his mouth just millimeters from my ear. He had recently dyed his hair an unnatural shade of black, and if I wasn’t mistaken in the discreet lighting he was also wearing an application of make-up over his pale cheeks, giving them an unearthly rosy glow....

“How’s it going, George?” Rick said, but the old man just turned and skulked away.

“Who was that?” I asked.

“His name is George, but we call him the Evil Mime. He’s, like, eighty years old, and once upon a time he even worked with Marcel Marceau. He actually made a career out of being a mime, if you can believe that. If you give him five minutes, he’ll tell you all about it.” Rick paused, then added, “The key is not to give him those five minutes.”

What can I say to the rookies? Just that they should have first read the definitive book. That's not just my not-so-humble opinion; it's the opinion of everyone who works there.

Related: The Townhouse Magical Mystery Tour