IF I MUST...
...I must.

Joel has tagged me, and I'm 'it.' The Official Rules of the Caesar's Bath Meme, as he explains them:

Said meme takes its name from Mel Brooks' A History of the World (Part I), and, upon receiving it, one is supposed to list five things that one's circle of friends or peer group is wild about, but that one can’t really understand the fuss over. Quoth Caesar, "Nice. Nice. Not thrilling . . . but nice."

My List of Five:

1. Vodka. Everyone I know drinks vodka. Lots of it. I'm often the odd man out, since I never -- well, almost never -- touch the stuff. If I do, I have flashbacks to that very bad night 29 years ago involving the infused watermelon, and we really don't want to go there.

2. Cher. If my boyfriend reads this, I am so divorced, but... I don't get it. I find Cher moderately diverting, but I wouldn't go out of my way. It's great that she's still working at 83 years of age, but what's the big deal?

3. Shopping. Shopping is something one does out of necessity. It is not recreation... not even close. Here's the way it should work: go to a store, get in, and get out. Oh -- and that cute little thing that you bought so you could keep telling everyone it's Prada? That cute thing isn't cute on you.

4. Convertibles. You can't carry on a conversation without yelling and your hair gets messed up. Need I say more?

5. Dance clubs. You can't carry on a conversation without yelling and people keep trying to force you to dance. People wearing Prada.

Since Joel passed the meme to three people, I guess that's what I'm supposed to do. So let's see what the following people think:

* Karen, because I owe her revenge for an earlier meme;

* Spike, because that 'schizophrenic Jekyll & Hyde personality' should provide for some interesting answers; and

* Young Matthew. Just because.