Thursday, November 06, 2008

HERE, LET ME HELP

Here I am, putting the 'free' into freelance editing!

The 4-Point Guide to Discrediting Rham Rahm Emanual Emanuel

It's official: Rham Rahm Emanuel has accepted Barack Obama's offer to become his chief of staff, according to MSNBC's "source very close to Rham Rahm Emanuel." So what about "partisan" Emanuel can Republicans glob glom on to immediately to paint Obama's first appointment as evidence of the Democratic president-elect's incompetence?

• He swears, saying "fuck" a lot. Read: He's an angry, angry man! This is especially important because the GOP will be called racist if they try to make Obama out to be an angry black man.

• Emanuel is a ballet dancer. Read: He's a fairy and won't be able to stand up to terrorists!

• He sends out Christmas cards to members of the press corps, featuring his three children very prominently. Read: He's a liberal Christian, the worst kind! Except … he's Jewish.

• His brother is Ari Emanuel, the Hollywood superagent and inspiration for Entourage's Ari Gold character. Read: Rham Rahm comes from a family of egomaniacs and Hollywood liberal elite! Oh, wait, that argument didn't work against Obama?


De nada.