Thursday, March 23, 2006

WHY ENUNCIATION MATTERS
Twenty minutes ago, in an office high above Third Avenue in Manhattan:

Me: How many RSVPs do we have for our Big Event?
Him: Forty-nine.
Me: Forty-nine? But the spreadsheet you sent earlier had 50 RSVPs.
Him: It's 49 when you take off the hetero.
Me: *blank stare* What did you say?
Him: We only have 49 when you take off the hetero.
Me: Take off--? What? Who?
Him: The header row on the spreadsheet. If you don't count it, you'll see we only have 49 RSVPs.
Me: Header row! Now I understand. I knew we were planning a pretty gay event, but I didn't think we were going to start keeping them out.
Token Female: Do you guys have to make a 'gay joke' about everything?

Note: some aspects of this conversation were changed for dramatic effect, and also because it took me closer to five minutes to figure out that 'hetero' was 'header row,' and I don't want you to think I'm quite that stupid.