Tuesday, December 30, 2008

ALL TOGETHER NOW

In honor of the Grand Old, Old, Old Party:

Chip the Magic Cracker, from Tennessee,
Thought through hate and ignorance he'd helm the RNC.
Chip the Magic Cracker, foolish as he could be,
Ironic that his party's now a despised minority.

Together they would travel, Chip and Rush and crew,
They'd play the game of race-baiting, then maybe bait a Jew,
But not all were below them, they'd say with a squeal,
"We like brown people, long as they're Jindal, or Michael Steele!"

Oh!
Chip the Magic Cracker, from Tennessee,
Thought through hate and ignorance he'd helm the RNC.
Chip the Magic Cracker, foolish as he could be,
Ironic that his party's now a despised minority.



I could write more, but that's all Chip is worth. We can only hope he's the next RNC chair. Those 87 Republican seats in the House of Representatives will feel might comfy for his members.

Friday, December 12, 2008

JUST LIKE OPRAH

Except better.

Timothy J. Lambert interviews Famous Author Rob Byrnes. Go read it.

Which reminds me: Fool for Love will be released imminently and is ready for your pre-order. This anthology is dripping with writerly goodness, and you don't want to miss it.

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG

From the in-box:

I have a new email address!

You can now email me at: hooperlee34@yahoo.com

I am Mr. Hooper Lee, at present I am suffering from throat cancer and have a hole in the heart.

- Hooper Lee
That's it. No request for money... no connections to shady banks or dictators... just throat cancer and a hole in the heart.

So obviously this one is legitimate. Now where's my checkbook?

Bonus: I loved To Kill a Mockingbird, and hate to think its author has a hole in the heart.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

CHANGES

In honor of my entry into my dotage, I think I need to change some things around here. For example, I think I will change the tagline of this blog to:

One of the Top 10 Search Results
for "mafia cut off penis"


You've got to be known for something. And salad-tossing is so 2005!

Sunday, December 07, 2008

EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN





Happy 50th, Billy Hufsey!

(And Happy 38th to Wayne Hoffman, 40th to Crash (Woo-Hoo! Big One!), 46th to Shaun, and a hearty "Die in a Fire" to Ann Coulter.)