AND YOU THOUGHT THAT YOUR PARENTS SCARRED YOU FOR LIFE!
This kid is going to need a lot of therapy.

I HAVE RETURNED
Actually, I returned two days ago, but I've had a very difficult time exiting Vacation Mode.

So Rehoboth Beach was nice. Not nearly as gay as I had expected, but that's fine. (Living in Manhattan, sometimes I need to be reminded that not every male under the age of 50 is gay.) And it was great to spend the better part of a week with the boyfriend. We've now been a long-distance couple for five months, and this was our longest stretch of togetherness. I'm happy to report that we not only survived all that togetherness, but we thrived. In fact, those seven days passed far too quickly.

I want to go back. Now!

Anyway, in the few hours I've been back from vacation, my week of relaxation has been completely undone, and I'm tenser and pissier than ever.

Did I mention that I want to go away on vacation yet?

More later...

OFF TO REHOBOTH
Goodbye, all! I'm off for my long-due vacation. Maybe I'll return next week with photographic evidence.

TRL: THE CUTTING EDGE
A few weeks after the blogging community effectively decided that Friendster was so 2002, I received my first invitation to join.

I think I'll go out and buy a trucker hat now...

OH, AND ABOUT THAT BLACKOUT...
...I'm not going to be blogging about it. Here's what it was: boring. I have no ill-will toward the experience, and I wasn't traumatized, and there was no drama, but I was bored. Bored bored bored bored bored. So bored that I was in the office at 7:00 the next morning in the hope that I'd find something to do.

I filed. And dusted.

As far as the rest of the weekend goes, when the power came on I spent a bit too much time in the bars. Thanks to Michael V. for getting me a cab Saturday night (although he also deserves condemnation for getting me in that condition, so we'll call it a wash.)

Tomorrow morning, I'm leaving for Rehoboth Beach, Delaware for a long awaited vacation. If you're there, look me up. If I don't hear from you, and you don't hear from me, before I leave, sleep well for the next week, secure in the knowledge that you will always be in my heart.

Oh, and someone please keep an eye on the power grid. Thanks!

THE MANY STRAIGHT EYES FOR THE QUEER GUY
Who says there are no new ideas?

The Top 18 Things Heard on "Straight Eye for the Queer Guy"
(by Matty, via Let Me Get This Straight)

Straight Eye For The Queer Shows
(via Jonno)

Ask "The Straight Eye for the Gay Guy"
(via NRO)

BLASTS FROM THE PAST
I hadn't planned on blogging much for a few days, but the week started off in the most fascinating way, and I have to share.

On Monday, and completely out of the blue, I received a very tentative e-mail asking if I was the same person who graduated 6th grade in 197-- 1981. I recognized the correspondent's name and quickly wrote back, and since then... well, since then I've been immersed in an on-line reunion of half the graduating class, most of whom I haven't seen in thir--... more than twenty years.

It's been a fascinating, fabulous trip back in time. I have laughed at things I haven't thought about since my teens and, yes, felt a few twinges of embarrassment over actions long past and almost forgotten. But meeting these people again -- as adults, not pre-pubescent children -- has been wonderful.

In recognition of the past, I now give TRL readers a glimpse of our (incorrectly dated) class picture. Can you find the future famous author?

I DIDN'T WANT A SEGWAY, BUT I WANT ONE OF THESE
Man on Motorized Bar Stool Pulled Over

It doesn't get any better than that.

QUEER EYE FOR THE NAZI GUY
Unfortunately, I won't be home tonight to see the Fab Five from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy in the same room with Pat Buchanan. This is the sort of cultural event that makes life worth living.

Please! Someone tape this for my later enjoyment!
(via Gothamist)

END OF A TREND
Flash mobs have hit Rochester, New York. The phenomenon is now now Officially Over.

ALMOST BACK
It is so me to launch a blog, then abandon it after a few weeks. But I promise that's not what I'm doing here. Not this time, at least.

I'm feeling just a bit burned out right now, but in a few days I'll be ready to go. Beyond the random links and one-liners, I need to develop a personality for this site, and that shall be done. I was thinking 'borderline schizophrenic.' What do you think?

I have good news, though: earlier today, the completed manuscript for Trust Fund Boys, my second novel, was delivered to Kensington Publishing. It's done, and I'm happy as can be. Yay, me!

Maybe I'll post some excerpts in the upcoming weeks. But only if you behave.

Now, though, I'm resting my brain -- and my two typing fingers -- for a few more days. TRL thanks you, as always, for your patience.

CARTOON OF THE WEEK
Marriage is a Sacred Institution

WHY GORE IS NOT PRESIDENT, PART CCLVII
Whether you support or oppose US military action in Iraq, you have to agree that Al Gore's timing is off by a few months.

GORE PLANS NYU ANTI-WAR SPEECH

Coming soon to a headline near you: "Gore Plans to Oppose War in Viet Nam."

THE DEATH OF HAMSTERS,
AND OTHER DESTRUCTIVE CONSEQUENCES
OF GAY MARRIAGE
Lance Arthur details the End of the World as We Know It which would result from gay marriage:

If we allow two men to marry—and please consider that there is no reason on God's green and gentle and landmined Earth why two men should even want to marry since the only possible reason to get married is to put more babies in the world to grow up to be people who get married to put more babies in the world who grow up to get married...

But of course!
(Via Queer Day)

WHY I WON'T GO ON A A STAR DATE
Because my match is Leif Garrett. 'Nuff said.



E! On-Line Star Dates.
(Via Gothamist)

BY THE WAY...
Have you gotten the impression that I'm so backed up, I've decided to blog instead of dealing with it? Yes, that will mean I'll just have to work all the harder to catch up once I again feel the Protestant Work Ethic in my bones, but, well... it always happens eventually.

ROB: THE WONDER YEARS
Not really. Well... maybe.
(Via NRO)

ROB ROBBED!
New York Magazine picked some guy from Brooklyn as the city's Sexiest Writer. Paul something. Whatever. Let Little Paul Whatsisname enjoy his little recognition. I don't care. Not one bit...

Fortunately, I'm getting used to being overlooked for the awards I deserve.

I'M BACK (BUT NOT REALLY)
Wonderful weekend. Boyfriend in New York... cocktails in Hell's Kitchen... deaf people on Broadway... "Legally Blonde" on television... cabaret on restaurant row... naps on drizzly afternoons... and I even got some writing done.

But now it's Monday, and I'm behind. Dozens of e-mails and hundreds of other things, and no time. So the chances are slim that there will be anything worth reading here until... later in the week. (I have some thoughts, actually, but not the time.)

So follow this link instead, and do what you can to help Adam Felber save his marriage!
(Via Uffish Thoughts, where it seems I'm finding lots o' links lately.)